Dear Moron #338,
What the hell?! People like you should not be allowed to ride the bus. Not only did you block the entire aisle by holding both of your arms up at the top of the poles on either side so all of us were squished to one side of the bus, your nasty-ass jacket was too short which then showed your hairy, giggly belly and your goddamn stained boxers. It’s bad enough that you wouldn’t budge when people asked you to, so instead they had to duck and crouch down under your rank smelling armpits, while at the same time trying really hard to weave around so as to not rub any part of them against you as if they were playing a live game of Operation or Hot Potato. One of these things just doesn’t belong, and it’s you. Next stop, my-fist-in-your-face-ville.
Allergic to you. xo