Dear Guy with Dog* (you know who you are… actually, you probably don’t, since you don’t know who I am. Fyi: I’m that awkward chick who has your exact same schedule. You know, the one won’t look you in the eye and acts as if her ipod is the most interesting fucking thing since sliced bread. Yup. You got it, I’m that girl),
After much deliberation, I’ve come to believe that you are genuinely frightened of me.
What gave it away? Hmmm…
Well for starters, it was the way you urgently pressed the button as we stood at the intersection waiting for the light to change. I mean, jesus, it’s not as if I was standing there with a loaded gun (maybe). I’m surprised that button didn’t sink into the pole the way you were hitting it like you were the Duck Hunt gold medalist. Seriously, it took quite a bit of strength to not burst out laughing, but I managed to compose myself, because, well that’s what I do.
Anyhoo, good on ya, buddy. Congrats.
Here’s a tip: Try changing your schedule. That way I won’t be awkward and you won’t be running scared. Deal? Deal.
Allergic to you.xo
* <— HEY! WTF! This little guy means I’m shocked I even took the time to write this. Wowzers, batman.